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    .
    Teach your grandchildren rebellion. That way, you get revenge on your children

    I taught mine to question everything. If someone tells them to do something that they're not comfortable with and they're not given a satisfactory reason as to why, then don't do it. Am I wrong?
    Our cruising days are over now.................

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      Marie, I think it depends what you mean by 'spoiling'. If you give them lots of attention and treats that don't go against their parent's specific dictates, then that's 'good' spoiling. But if you defy their parent's wishes and pander to their every whim, then, in my opinion, that's 'bad' spoiling. No. not wrong OSD, it's good for them to have an enquiring mind and to rationalise and not to believe everything they're told, Re. grandparents, my mother's parents died long before I was born, so I only had my paternal grandparents. Tey used to live with my dand's sister, but eventually didn't get on so came to live with us for a while when I was about 8. Then they were were allocated an alms house - a row of three cottages - a living room, small lean-to kitchen, one bedroom and outside toilet at the other end of the terrace. I didn't have children from my first marriage, and by the time I married my second husband, his children were all grown up and married with children. As they lived some distance away we didn't have too much contact. Eldest son lives in the Philippines - we've visited once, but usually keep in touch on Skype. Daughter comes to visit us a once or twice a year, and grandson (from second son who was killed in a road accent) and girlfriend come to see us a couple of times a year The first couple of years after we'd moved here, we'd go back and try and see everybody - from Scotland to Wales to Portsmouth, but that certainly didn't make for a pleasant 'holiday' so we haven't done that for a few years now. And of 11 great-grandchildren, many have been lost through divorce, which sems to be the way of the world now, doesn't it?

      Comment


        Exactly right Gill.
        When i was little and my mother told me to do something, if i asked why 9 which I always seemed to do0, her answer was "Y is a crooked letter that can't be put straight, like you." i never understood that, and when I had my sons I decided to give them reasons why they should or should not do something. My older one generally took everything literally and complied, but the younger one would listen to maybe 99 reasons; then he'd say, "Well, I listened to what you said, Mum, but I'm still going to do----whatever"
        That didn't work out did it?

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          No two kids are alike, even identical twins have separate personalities. I have no grandchildren, so can't contribute to that discussion, but if I ever asked my mum why, she said "Because I say so!" Likewise if I wanted to do something that my friends were doing and she didn't want to allow it she'd say "If ........ Put their hand in the fire, would you?" Anyone else hear that one?

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            .
            I wish I had a pound for everytime my mum told me that. I remember just after the war seeing some other children in the flats where we lived at the time eating sugar butties and so I asked my mum for one. She replied "while we've got jam, you'll eat jam". I didn't understand what she meant but I later found out my dad bought it off the black market. Happy days. We never had any sweets as they were still on ration, but as the old adage proved, what you've never had you never miss. So true don't you think?
            Our cruising days are over now.................

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              Yes, OSD, but while you may not 'miss' something as you've never had it, you can still want it, can't you? You must be older than me, because I can remember having a (singular) sweet on a Sunday evening ( from a quarter pound bag of toffees or boiled sweets, or whatever). Plus me and my brother had a special treat on a Friday of perhaps a Swizzle lolliipop or a liquorice dab. But those were the only things we ever had. Today's kids seem to eat sweets and chocolates and fizzy drinks 24/7, don't they?

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                Yes OSD, but I can remember being so jealous of a friend with parents rich enough to buy her a pony. I had an agreement with my aunt, who owned a newsagents that I would work for her at weekends until I'd earned enough to buy a pony, then I'd work to keep it. I didn't go short of sweets because of the shop, but I never had any spare cash! What did you work at as a child?

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                  Anything I did had to be done for nothing; once a lady gave me 3 pennies for running an errand for her and my mum made me give it back. I was 15 before I received pocket money. My sister suggested it to my mum and said if mum and dad gave me a shilling each she would too. Trouble was she lived in London, so what she left in advance didn't last for many weeks and mum used to give me half a crown. Dad never gave me anything at all. Were most dads like that?

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                    Yes, I think in their generation the man earned the money and the woman managed the budget. My mum always worked, but when I think back she never stayed in a job for long. They lived in the same house all their married life and My dad worked for the same company all his life after leaving the army. People move around more now don't they?

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                      They say everything goes round, so when was it like it is today?

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                        I was a Saturday girl at Woolworths - very long hours and earned 15 shillings! Only got half a crown pocket money until I started work. I think on this topic, it's not part of a cycle, Marie, but something progressive, isn't it?

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                          Yes, it's progress of a sort. Isn't it amazing what we have seen in our life time? When we got married we had three days in Llanduno for honeymoon, now they expect the Maldives or Seychelles. However couples get married much later generally speaking. I was 20 and Alan 21. How old were you?

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                            Last time around 48, my toy boy 35. I think he's catching me up though; do we go backward once we're in our 2nd childhood?

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                              .
                              I'm my OH's toy boy. Does that make her a cougar?
                              Our cruising days are over now.................

                              Comment


                                Definitely OSD, and good for her! Age is just a number isn't it?

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