Customs? Is what they do all necessary or is it Bullying?

On my last blog I mentioned my fascination with Customs

I thought I would write about a few experiences I have had with Customs and Immigration and maybe you would like to share yours.

Customers officers seem to strike fear into many. You know what I mean, you must have had that nervous feeling when you are going through customs or immigration. You start feeling guilty even though you have not done anything, your mouth goes dry, you lick your lips and you can’t seem to get your words out or you start babbling about totally unrelated things.  You hand over your passport and the man sits totally straight faced staring at you. Not asking you anything just staring and you want the ground to open up and swallow you.  That nervous trickle of sweat seeps from under your hairline under the intense scrutiny.

You can’t hack it any longer so you start babbling about how old the photo is and you never wear your hair like that anymore and you know it looks nothing like you…  Funnily enough I have always wondered why you have to be so straight faced on a passport and not smile. Who goes through an airport with a face like a sullen trout? Usually you are either going on holiday or coming back so you have a smile on your face like a Cheshire cat. So surely it makes more sense to smile on the passport.

Anyway, the real reason they stare is facial expression and body language. They are trained to study these. A cold sweat, a nervous tick, a pulsing artery in your neck, rapid breathing, licking your lips, avoiding eye contact, a trembling hand etc… They are all signs that you are nervous about something and may warrant further investigation.  Did you know there are teams of people whose job it is to test this out. They go to airports in disguise and see if they can get through security with knives, guns and devices made to look like or mimic a bomb etc… They see if they get picked up on x-rays and by the teams there to keep you safe.

Some Airports are now using sophisticated camera equipment to zoom in on the faces of passengers waiting in queues to study them without them being aware. If they identify someone of interest they will then pull them aside for a random check. Here they look for other signs of nervousness. Adjusting your clothes or twiddling your hair, biting your lips or looking about you to seem disinterested in what they are doing. Avoid using expressions like “to be honest with you”. It makes you sound guilty.

From past experience don’t try to joke with them. I went to New York not long after 9-11 and security was very strict both on arrival and departure. Every passenger was having a pat down search when we were leaving JFK. A group of four lads were trying to break the sombre tone and were laughing and joking about. One said “what are you looking for? You don’t think I have a bomb or anything do you?” and within in seconds all four were surrounded by security and taken off somewhere. We did see them a number of hours later in departures but they were certainly looking very subdued.  So best not to joke!

Another experience I had was when we went to Florida. My husband has a hand tremor. Nothing serious, his dad had it too. When we were going through immigration you have to put your finger in the scanner and the officer must have noticed his hand shaking. He stood with his finger on the scan waiting for the guy to say ok but he didn’t. He just stood and stared intently. It really was making my husband and me for that matter very uncomfortable. Eventually I asked if there was an issue. My Son was with us and he was only 6 at the time. The officer glanced at me but did not reply. He turned his attention back to my husband. Then after another long pause he asked if there was a problem. My husband asked with what? He then asked if he was nervous about anything to which he replied no. He asked if he was maybe needing something. Being a bit naïve we were puzzled but then I twigged what he meant. He thought he was maybe having withdrawal from something after the long flight. My husband had to explain about his tremor and even then, we were there a fair while being asked more questions before they let us leave.

The important thing to remember is that they are just doing a job. Show them respect, answer any questions when asked and truthfully. If you start making up porkies you will trip yourself up and it will make life far more complicated.  They do not want to hold you up un-necessarily so don’t take it personally, they are not doing it just because they can. They have procedure to follow so just try to chill out a little.

Try to avoid looking like this when you go through!

I am sure you all have stories to tell about incidents with customs and which countries you feel are the most intimidating.  I would love to hear from you if you have.